The value of so called weak connections is quite well known in the online world, but how powerful is it in the offline world? Researchers from Singapore have explored the importance of what they term familiar strangers. These are the people we see each day on the train to work or in our local supermarket each weekend. They’re the people who provide a valuable source of social potential as neighbours or friends.
We know a reasonable amount about our intentional connections, but much less about our so called hidden social network. Lijun Sun from Singapore set out to change that by analysing the passive interactions between the 3 million or so users of Singapore’s bus network.
Poring through this data enabled them to see how often so called in vehicle encounters occured, in which two individuals are on the same bus at the same time. For instance, in one particular week some 18 million of these encounters were recorded, with strong patterns of repitition emerging.
What’s more, the data revealed that 85% of these repeated encounters happened at the same time each day, with morning encounters more common than afternoon ones.
The researchers found that these encounters typically occur because we are creatures of habit, and these habits can quickly become synchronised with other people. The more regular your behaviour, the more likely you are to meet the same people each day.
What I found interesting though was the value these relationships have for society. The researchers suggest that the connections that evolve between these familiar strangers grows stronger over time. In other words, the more frequently we see that person on the train each morning, the more likely we are to become socially connected to one another.
With things like the Oyster Card here in London it should be fairly easy to replicate this kind of study in cities around the world, which would give some insight into the ties that bind a community together.
London commuters are famous for their unsociable demeanour on public transport, but this research goes to show that there is much that binds us together with our fellow travellers. So maybe next time you see a familiar face on your travels, you can say hi and get to know them a bit better.
It is true that you often see the same people, be they at the gym, on your commute or wherever. What I hardly ever see though, and certainly don't do myself, is approach these folks and strike a conversation with them.
I'm much the same I have to say. Hard to make that first move isn't it? 🙂
For over two years I saw a neighbor and his wife next door as we were coming and going. They are about the same age as my grown sons. At first I put up a silent defense at their friendly attempts. I respectfully acknowledged but did not engage. Sometimes the crisis and intense engagement working in the community leaves me seeking solitude. With time, occasionally we visited about small things. The last year has found us at each other doors with requests from, can you watch my dog to hey can you jump off my car. I have returned home to find my garbage cans pulled back up to their spot and opened my door when she stood there with their sick child (just ask a nurse :-).
This year his wife and small children were gone on Fourth of July leaving him alone. When I invited him to our family gathering, I sat a little stunned as we all talked. His knowledge and education on tech, web and gaming taught me a big lesson. Presumption had led to several wrong conclusions; never judge a book by it's cover. He too found out that a nurse has a little tech in her too and now we chat everything from dogs, kids to digital in the snippets of time in our driveways.
Societal/social prejudices and expectations are such that encourage silence. Who wants to be the one everyone stares at for being friendly on a ride with quiet commuters? Breaking the social barrier isn't always easy but if you are wiling, be prepared at the amazing people and experiences you will have. Just ask a nurse!