The disparity in negotiation skills continues to be one of the more enduring reasons given for why men and women tend to earn different amounts.  Whilst I think there is enough evidence to cast a degree of doubt on that basic heuristic, a recent study does nonetheless highlight the different approaches men and women take to negotiating.

Gender differences in negotiations

The key difference, the authors found, was the use of small talk during negotiations.  It emerged that men were great at developing social capital via the use of small talk, which then makes it more likely that they will gain from the subsequent negotiations.

“We saw a boost in positive negotiation outcomes for men when they engaged in small talk before the negotiation,” the authors say. “Even a little small talk contributed to getting a better deal.”

Interestingly however, the same was not the case for women.  It transpired that whilst both men and women would often engage in small talk (although men seemed keener), the benefits of it would largely only occur for men.

Expected gender roles

This difference, the authors contend, is largely down to our expectations around how the genders should behave.  For instance, we largely expect women to be more communicative, and thus expect small talk from them.  We therefore don’t reward them so much when they conform to expectations.

This communal behavior is much less expected in men however, so it confounds our expectations and is more likely to result in brownie points given to the man that can do it well.

This is especially the case where small talk itself is not expected.  So, for instance, if you’re in a contract interview it helps both men and women to engage in small talk, but this positive perception only translates into a better deal for the men.

“Our findings reinforce the notion that men and women in the same situation, engaging in the same behavior, can experience different reactions because of different behavioral expectations associated with their gender,” Mislin said. “But our research also suggests that there may be areas where violating stereotypes is beneficial, as we see here for the men who engage in small talk.”