It can be easy to fall into the trap of thinking that emotions have no place at work.  It’s a mindset that suggests you should park your emotions at the door each morning when you go into work.  New research from Stanford Graduate School of Business highlights just how wrong this approach is.

The researchers borrow from the costly signaling theory, which shows how a seemingly small act, such as acknowledging others’ emotions, can have a powerful effect because it underlines genuine intentions.  For instance, a boss who exhibits concern for the emotions of a team member is showing genuine intent because the situation may potentially be a messy one.

“A leader could very easily see someone in distress and choose to ignore it,” the researchers say. “But only a leader who truly is benevolent and cares about employees would risk getting involved by voluntarily acknowledging the distressed employee. Thus, employees might take this as a signal that this leader is someone who can be trusted with their well-being.”

Emotional acknowledgment

The researchers conducted a field experiment in a hospital setting, with volunteers shown videos of a couple of actors acknowledging emotions in a break room at work.  The volunteers reported higher trust levels in those able to acknowledge emotions than in those who could not.

“There was a big trust gap between no acknowledgment and acknowledgment when expressers displayed positive emotions, but this gap was even more pronounced when expressers displayed negative emotions,” the researchers say.

That this is so should perhaps not be too surprising, as when we ask someone who appears unhappy about their emotional state, it fosters higher levels of trust precisely because doing so is riskier and is likely to involve a greater investment of time and effort.

It also emerged that it is generally better to speak up, even if we do so in the wrong way, than to remain silent.  The results show that trust can be developed even when we misinterpret emotions.

“I think there is a lay theory that inaccurate interpretation is punished,” the researchers say. “We found that if you are feeling negatively and I say, “Hey, you seem happy,” there is a trust penalty. But if you are feeling positively and I say, “Hey, you seem upset,” there was virtually no penalty. And that’s because even though you didn’t need my support, my willingness to call out a negative emotion signals a readiness for me to provide support to you.”

Uncommon practice

The value of emotional acknowledgment may be in part because it is not especially common to see it among leaders.

“Leaders experience a tension between being task oriented and people oriented. They need to get things done. There’s also some research that shows they see emotional support as falling outside of their formal job expectations,” the researchers say. “So, there is evidence to suggest that leaders are not acknowledging emotions as much as they could. And even when they are doing it, I suspect that they are celebrating wins and acknowledging and amplifying positive emotions more than they are acknowledging pain or distress because it’s easier.”

Now is a great time for leaders to make emotional acknowledgement a part of their repertoire, as employees’ emotions are likely to be especially pertinent at the moment given the various strains caused by the pandemic.

“The worst thing leaders can do when employees are feeling badly is to do nothing. If leaders want to signal care and build trust, they need to meet people where they are,” the researchers conclude. “Our research suggests one way to do that is by proactively engaging in emotional acknowledgment because it grants employees the space and license to share their emotions.”