An hour before an important exam, a college student feels tense. Then their phone buzzes: “I’m so proud of everything you’ve worked for. Good luck today, babe <3.” The message is from their partner.
New psychology research from Cornell shows that even brief, supportive texts from a romantic partner can help people cope with stressful events. Undergraduate students who received encouragement before exams felt significantly more positive and less anxious compared to those who got no message or a generic one from researchers.
Regulating our emotions
This study is one of the first outside a lab to show that reminders of a close partner can help regulate emotions.
“The idea that just thinking about your partner can provide benefits is hugely important,” the researchers explain. “Most of our time is spent apart, but simply knowing they’re there—even from a distance—has ripple effects on our well-being.”
Previous studies show that contact with a close partner can reduce stress. Holding a spouse’s hand, for example, made distressing memories less intense and lowered heart rates in public speaking tasks. Even symbolic reminders—seeing a partner’s name or photo—helped people recover from difficult experiences and tolerate mild pain.
Translating to daily life
But lab results don’t always translate to daily life. Researchers weren’t sure a short text message could cut through everyday distractions.
To test this, they conducted two studies with about 170 college students in romantic relationships lasting at least three months. The students were enrolled in multiple classes with frequent exams. Researchers collected pre-written supportive messages from their partners and sent them an hour before randomly selected exams.
The first study, with 40 students, showed an initial emotional boost from partner texts. The second, larger study confirmed this effect wasn’t just from the novelty of getting a message. It also tested whether a “good luck” text from someone else—researchers, in this case—would have the same impact.
Clear results
The results were clear: partner texts, but not the researchers’ messages, significantly improved mood and reduced anxiety. The stress of the exam remained, but students still felt better. Researchers noted this made sense—some stress can help with focus and performance.
Surprisingly, the benefits didn’t depend on the message’s quality. Long or short, affectionate or plain, with or without pet names or emojis—it didn’t matter.
“Just receiving a supportive text from their partner, no matter how simple, boosted their mood,” the researchers explain.
They believe these effects aren’t limited to romantic partners. A message from any trusted confidante—like a best friend or parent—could help ease stress.
“It’s almost like saying, ‘I’m thinking of you,’” the authors conclude. “Short and sweet really works.”
